Remote control is broken - DirecTV

Why do I have to call a 1-800 number during normal business hours to order a replacement remote control. I'm positive it's broken, no troubleshooting tips needed... been a customer for almost a decade, I know how ot use the remote and trust me this one is broken... please send me a new one and I'll mail back the old one. Thanks.

This question, "Remote control is broken," is about DirecTV channels, programming, equipment, and sports.