Tiger made the news

Orrymain

, Blogger: Orry's Orations
#1
So for an hour or so today, Tiger Woods made the news but for all the wrong reasons. Did any of you stop to watch the action? CNN, Fox, local stations -- they were all talking Tiger, fire hydrants, and theories. It was all very dramatic and overly climatic I think.
 

EscapeVelocity

Moderator, , Webmaster of EV's Antenna Blog
#3
Yeah, it was weird.

Of the clues, what I gather is Tiger was drunk and ran into a fire hydrant near the entrance to his house....probably on the way home from a bar.

That is mere speculation, but you dont run into a fire hydrant stone cold sober, fast enough to seriously injure yourself.
 

Piggie

Super Moderator
#6
It's utterly disgusting that a national hero is a drunk driver.

To give him more than a moment of to call him what he is, a bad example to young golfers and old alike, a poppas a-s-s, and a loser that should be ashamed of himself shows exactly what news on TV (except PBS) is all about.
 

EscapeVelocity

Moderator, , Webmaster of EV's Antenna Blog
#8
BTW, it looks like it was a tree. And if it was on private property, especially his then there really isnt a crime here.

If it was his neighbors then that is between him and his neighbor.
 

CptlA

DTVUSA Member
#9
Are they saying it's drunk driving now? I heard he was trying to drive away from his wife after she was trying to beat him with a golf club. For adultery. :)
 

Orrymain

, Blogger: Orry's Orations
#10
No, they are all saying alcohol wasn't involved. However, what still gets me is that Tiger NEVER talked to the police. His wife and entourage managed to keep the police form EVER interviewing him and still the police closed the investigation. That seems bogus to me.

Now Tiger today admitted to 'transgressions'. In other words, that gal in the news who said she's been having an affair with him for over two years -- she's telling the truth.

It sounds like Tiger and wife probably had a fight and that is what initiated the accident. That's my guess.
 
#11
Just goes to show the headaches he could have prevent if he kept his putter covered and in the bag...if you get my drift. LOL Besides, his wife looks hot. Why would he want to mess around?
 

Fringe Reception

Super Moderator, Chief Content Editor
Staff member
#15
Ok, I'll lift my restraints and comment publically:

The current joke going around is Tiger Woods has hired an attorney to change his first name to Cheetah ... ar ar ar!

When I told my girlfriend Julie that joke, without mising a heartbeat she replied:

"They should come out with a new Cheetah Woods Chia Pet for Christmas. Can you hear the commercial in your head?" Cha cha cha cheetah!

Jim
 
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Aaron62

Contributor
Staff member
#16
Ok, I'll lift my restraints and comment publically:

The current joke going around is Tiger Woods has hired an attorney to change his first name to Cheetah ... ar ar ar!

When I told my girlfriend Julie that joke, without mising a heartbeat she replied:

"They should come out with a new Cheetah Woods Chia Pet for Christmas. Can you hear the commercial in your head?" Cha cha cha cheetah!

Jim
;) With the mistress count now up to 14 now, Cheetah is quite fitting. ;)
 

Orrymain

, Blogger: Orry's Orations
#17
Oh, I hate to say it, but Jim, that was darn funny. :} I don't pity him being the brunt of jokes. He will be for the rest of his life and it will probably affect his golfing legacy, but we're all human. cha cha cha cheetah! Oh, that's bad, but it's funny. Arg.
 

Fringe Reception

Super Moderator, Chief Content Editor
Staff member
#18
Tiger Woods Poem

Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
Cause a bimbo's phone number was in his Blackberry.
He'd been cheating' on Elin, and the story progressed.
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
He'd been cheating with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
Tigers sad sordid tale was all over the news.
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
Despite all his cryin and beggin' and pleadin',
Tigers wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden.
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
"If youre gettin' laid then I'm gettin' paid."
She's not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year...
 
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